Going to Subway is always an adventure for me. First of all I am the worlds pickiest person. I also happen to take my food VERY seriously. So a lot of times, I tend to get very ticked if things with my food do not go my way.
Yesterday, Rosa and I were not feeling up to par, so instead of walking we decided to go get lunch at Subway. Besides their delicious subs, the people of Subway have a little scrabble game going where you can win all kinds of fun prizes. We arrived at our local Subway, and there is a line out the door. Is there a sale at Subway and we did not get the memo? I mean, I know they have 5 dollar foot longs and all, but this is a bit much. I considered telling Rosa we should leave, but keep my mouth shut. Patience is not my number one virtue when it comes to food.
As we approach the line, I notice the gentlemen behind the counter is staring at us. I hate people who stare. Not only is it rude, but it makes me wonder what the heck is on me that he is staring at. I know it can't be my stunning good looks, because I do not get dressed up for work, so there must be something on me that he is mystified by that he is staring at. I look at myself and there is nothing wrong with my clothing, so I come to the conclusion that he is just a rude son of a bitch who likes to stare at hungry white girls.
The same rude person asks me what kind of bread I want. I tell him that I will take the 9 grain honey oat. Then he says did you say you wanted turkey? At first I was confused, because I knew I hadn't said turkey yet, but that is in fact what I wanted. Since I didn't feel like arguing yet, I said yes. He passes my bread to the chick next to him. She proceeds to fold the meat in a way that irritates me. Now, it takes every fiber of my being to not lunge across the counter and show her the right way to do her job. I've been to enough Subways, I know how they are supposed to lay out the meat, and she was NOT doing it right. I can feel my toes curly with anxiety because the meat is hanging off of the bread and for some reason this is the most frustrating thing that could have happened (or so I thought).
Next they ask me what kind of cheese I want. I say American and I always ask for extra. Some may say "that's not good for you Dani", but what I say to you is, you don't know my obsession with cheese, so shut your pie hole. Their cheese slices are more like cheese half slices so I think its A-OK to put extra on it. Next question they ask me is if I want it toasted. I explain to them that I would like it toasted and ask if they could toast it a little longer than usual. Remember the rude dip shit from before with the staring problem? He decides to chime in and ask me if I'd like it burnt with a smirk on his face. Not funny dude. What is this, comedic hour at Subway? Go back to staring at other hungry people in line, isn't that what you do best?
My sub comes out of the toaster and it is toasted just how I like it. I find the part of the Subway experience that is least thrilling for me is when they add all the veggies and dressings. I ask for spinach, she puts on a few leaves, I have to ask for more. I ask for onions, she puts a bunch in the middle, I have to ask for her to evenly spread them out and same goes for the green peppers. Like how hard is this? This is your JOB to make a freaking sub and you can't do it? I know I am being harsh, but this drives me NUTS. The last thing I need them to do for me is put yellow mustard on my sandwich. She squirts some down the crack of the roll. Really? Is that where you think mustard goes? Wouldn't it be better if you evenly squeezed some over the whole sandwich. So I ask for more and she squirts it in the same spot. At this point I am beyond frustrated and I ask her to spread it out on the sandwich. Just remembering this whole incident makes my body cringe. I really try to not let this stuff get to me, but if I am going to eat it, I take it very seriously and I make no apologies for that.
Long story short, although eating healthy is great, it can really be a hassle for me. I am far too particular for the mediocre folks they hire to work at Subway. It's like if you can't figure out how to make a sub, something is wrong with you. Part of me wants to open my own subway and have a rigorous training process so that my sandwich comes out perfect every time. But I don't worry Subway, I will keep coming back for more, because I am a glutton for punishment!
No comments:
Post a Comment